Ramadan really is flying fast! In the blink of eye, it's gonna end soon. With Raya coming, I am not really looking forward to it. The reason is simple, I have only a day to spend time with my family. Is that even call a day to spend? I dunno. With the fact that things are going down, I don't really think I'm as happy as how I might turn out to be.

Talking about accept the changes, I still can't accept the fact that Late nenek will not be with us for this year. Haiz.. Alhough it's been years, do you think it's easy to replace someone u ever loved before? Do you think it is as easy as knowing U fail some major exams? I am not gonna say that I don't enjoy my life and have my laughter after all these years. I do. But that probably because I'm trying to stay strong by saying that things will get better. As a matter of fact, things don't. People just make me feel the right to be sad.

And as days goes by, with many happy times i had, I really wished I could still share with her. I really wished to talk to her like everyday she used to do. Frankly speaking, being in health science settings doesn't really help me much of moving on. It just made me think back of what I could actually do to stop from that to happen. Talking about dying does traumatized me a little bit. I am really trying, to accept the fact that everyone will go through that phase. But accepting the fact the loved one goes on, who will do it instantly?

=/