I donnoe, somehow, I am always the one that U think, making things worst.Well, yes, I admit that I did my mistakes towards U, but U are not really putting much effort to know why I did this or that way. Well, it doesn't bother me much now.U are hating me, sure, cause it's just fine with me now. Besides, U have the rights to judge or decide with whom U wanna be friend with. Maybe I did change. It takes time for me to really adapt with things around me.Hence, I did change. But I always have no bad intentions at all. As U know, I sometimes over-do things even if it is over limit. Why? Because I used to think that it doesn't matter at all. And also because U deserve my attention and times. Not now,anymore. I don't blame U if I am the one that change. Not because I change due to your actions. But because of my own surroundings and situations that I am having.



I know I have always been indirect towards U. Because I want U to know the way I think things in my way. But I guess I didn't do it right this time round. U make it sound so sirius over small matter. I find it so stupid to drag over small matters into big even if U think I am thinking about stupid things.. U think it's worth it to break it?U think I deserve the heart pain again and again even though it doesn't affect me at all? Well, if that's what U have decided, I will just play along this ball game of yours. Because, I am bored anyway. Just bring the challenge and I'll start it. =D


To look on the bright side, hell ya, I know I am big damn egoistic person. Well, I am pretty GLAD that U always love to find all my bad side. Instead, why don't U go find some best pal that has no flaws, that is wayyy better than me. Cause yeah, I know U already mentioned to me that U hated me. Besides that, it shows how much U hate yourself too. Well, I feel sorry for U as U always make things sound so serious. I wonder why the hell U always takes things such a big deal over a small matter. Sheesh. U like doing it? Get a LIFE. ;)


Sadly, these past few days are much of a nightmare for me. I don't wish all these to happen, but sadly, it does. How pathetic can life be. U keep the fire burning even though I anguished the dangerous fire. If U wanna get things settled down, do it in a nicer way even if it takes big effort. Not by ranting bad words,harsh words,critics and agony towards me. It may seems that U venting all your anger towards me even if I didn' really make any mistakes at all. U will not get anywhere if U think that making things big is the only way to solve matters. I may stay silent, but that doesn't mean I didn't take things seriously. I am just waiting for the right time to share it with U as I don't wish to get U hurt like I did to my other friends.


Well, I should look on the bright side, because, now I am learning more and more to appreciate things in life. Alhamdulilah... I don't really wanna be sad about a lot of things anymore. As I don't wish to waste more tears than the previous.Because I know that I deserved to find my own happiness even though it may seems complicated. I know that it worth a try to find my own happiness. I know, I will feel sad without your existence in the future. But I am not gonna make it seems like its a big deal now. Cause I'm through with it. I am soo used to it already. I don't know why I have to bother so much about making a FRIENDSHIP works when it doesn't have to be so. I don't know why I have to think abt it too much even tho FRIENDS don't hurt among another.

" Friends don't hurt friends if they are really true to U. They won't let U cry, instead shed the tears away for U." Quoted by Cty.


Hence, I find it STUPID to make an effort for something that won't last for years in my own book of life. To matter worst, the other party didn't even realise with the effort that I've put in. So, I feel like I am being unwanted unless the need to do so. I don't feel any regrets,though, for all these things to happen. As I know, this all effort I'd made had came from the heart of my own and not just because it is my responsibility that I have to carry on with the friendship even though the other party take things for granted. As I know, this all are my lessons of life. Hence I know when or how to react if these kinds of things ever happen again, hope not though. Well, yes, different individual has their own perspectives when comes to help one another. Especially it involves how far they can help the other one.


Somehow, as the days goes by, the trust I have in U are depleting and fading away. This isn't how I expect it to be,though. But I know, I have to be fully prepared for the 'unexpected' part in the future.


The only question is, do I really hold the status of friend in part of your life?